Thursday, February 17, 2011

Attention to Detail

I'm a perfectionist by nature.  If something is not perfect it can drive me nuts.  A chair left pulled away from the table, a wallet on the countertop, or a crooked picture frame can make me go bonkers.

Being a perfectionist has it's perks but it definitely has it's drawbacks.   It can be exhausting running around picking up after others who are not Type A or you can sound like a real nag always pointing out things that are not in their proper place. And if your partner is not Type A it can leave you both frustrated and often becomes the source of conflict.

See my husband's not a perfectionist.  Little things out of place don't even phase him.  They go unnoticed.  He's usually okay with how things are.  He sees the big picture, while I zero in on the details.

I'd like to say that his being this way hasn't bothered me, but I'd be lying.  Truth is I've found myself wishing on more than one occasion that he gave more attention to detail, was more organized, that things would bother him more, etc.. That was until one day....

I was looking in the mirror, the kind that magnifies things by a million and to put it nicely I was not happy with what I saw.  Brown spots, red dots, fine lines (when did those appear?) and then those pesky gray hairs that like to pop up right at the hairline where I usually part my hair. Arggh!  And right when I was there criticizing my imperfections I remembered my husband and I smiled.

In that instant I realized that he doesn't zero in on my imperfections like I do.  When he looks at me he sees the big picture.  There's no criticism in his eyes.  And for the first time I was grateful he wasn't Type A like me.  It was as if a light bulb went on right then and there.

Ever since then instead of getting irritated w/him when things aren't just so, I remember how God nudged me and let me know that there can be an upside to things that drive us nuts.  And that being a perfectionist isn't always perfect.

Oh, and by the way, I think those mirrors should be outlawed. :)

Let's keep moving forward,



  1. I am so proud of you, your finally getting around to see how perfect your husband really is....LOL

  2. Liz: Definitely yin/yang. I am the less than Type A in our marriage. But, I have learned so much from Brian. He has helped me learn to be more responsible and think about how my being scatter brained can affect others. I would like to think that he has learned how to lighten up, not take everything so seriously and to laugh at the insanity of our lives. Besides, if married couples were both Type A or B, that would cause some serious conflict. I enjoy reading your blog. You inspire me.

  3. Beautifully Said!